Ah, dining out in America—whether you’re a seasoned traveler or a first-time visitor, understanding the local table manners can make your experience all the more enjoyable. American table manners, while generally relaxed and friendly, do have their own set of customs and etiquette that can be quite different from those in other countries. Here’s a comprehensive guide to help you navigate the dining landscape with ease.
The Basics of Setting the Table
Plates, Silverware, and Glasses:
- Plate: The plate is typically placed in the center of the table.
- Fork: The fork is placed to the left of the plate. When the meal is over, the fork is placed on the plate, tines up.
- Knife: The knife is placed to the right of the plate. When the meal is over, the knife is placed on the plate, blade in.
- Spoon: If soup is served, the spoon is placed to the right of the knife, handle up.
- Glasses: Water glasses are placed to the right of the knife, and wine glasses to the left, with the largest glass closest to the plate.
Napkin:
- The napkin is placed on the lap until the meal is over. If you need to leave the table, you can place the napkin on the chair back or the table.
Dining Etiquette
Saluting the Host:
- When arriving at the table, it’s customary to offer a greeting to the host or hostess. If it’s a formal setting, a handshake might be appropriate.
Starting the Meal:
- Wait for the host or hostess to start eating before you begin. In a casual setting, you can start when everyone is ready.
Using Silverware:
- Use the utensils on the outside of the placemat first, moving in towards the plate. For example, if you have a fork and a knife, start with the fork and use the knife to cut your food.
- When you’ve finished with a utensil, place it on the plate or the table, tines or blade up, depending on the utensil.
Dipping:
- When using a bread plate, if you’re dipping bread into a sauce, turn the plate slightly towards you to avoid getting sauce on the table.
Eating and Drinking:
- Eat slowly and chew with your mouth closed. Sip your drinks, and avoid loud slurping or gulping noises.
- If you’re not interested in a particular dish, it’s perfectly acceptable to leave it on the plate.
Toasting:
- When toasting, look at the person you’re addressing and hold your glass slightly above the level of the others. Raise your glass and say “cheers” or “to” something specific.
Coping with Differing Preferences
Vegetarian or Vegan Diners:
- If you’re dining with vegetarians or vegans, it’s important to be aware of their dietary restrictions. Ask for dishes that can be made without meat or dairy, or opt for a separate meal.
Children at the Table:
- Children are welcome at American restaurants, but it’s important to keep them well-behaved. Make sure they understand the basics of table manners and that they’re seated in a spot where they won’t be a distraction to others.
Dining Alone:
- Dining alone is perfectly acceptable in America. Just be sure to make eye contact with the waitstaff when they approach, and don’t hesitate to order a glass of wine or a cocktail to make your meal more enjoyable.
The Check and Beyond
Leaving a Tip:
- In most restaurants, a 15-20% tip is expected for good service. If the service is exceptional, you can leave a bit more. If it’s not up to par, you may leave less, but always leave something.
Paying the Check:
- In a casual restaurant, it’s common for the person who ordered the most expensive item to pick up the check. In a fine dining establishment, the check is usually brought to the table, and the person who wants to pay can do so at the table or take it to the cashier.
Reservations and Wait Times:
- If you’re dining at a popular restaurant, it’s a good idea to make a reservation. Be prepared for wait times, especially during peak dining hours.
By following these guidelines, you’ll be well on your way to mastering American table manners. Remember, the key is to be polite, observant, and flexible. With a bit of practice, you’ll fit right in and enjoy all that American dining has to offer. Bon appétit!